Funny Quotes

"Every now and then I like to lean out my window, look up and smile for a satellite picture." (Steven Wright)

"Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?" (George Carlin)

"As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree' -- probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on." (Woody Allen)